


Lips and Fingers

by Too_Punk_Rock_To_Function



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: And a little bit of angst, But mostly fluff, Fluff, Little bit of smut, M/M, just fluff, little bit of self harm, that's literally all it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-08
Updated: 2016-10-10
Packaged: 2018-08-20 03:53:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8235157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Too_Punk_Rock_To_Function/pseuds/Too_Punk_Rock_To_Function
Summary: Josh hurt his hands.Tyler hurt his lips.





	1. Fingers.

Josh couldn't help it.

When he was stressed he bit his nails.

When he was confused he picked his nails.

When he was bored he bit the skin around them.

When he couldn't focus he ripped at his cuticles.

It was just what he did.

He never noticed when he chewed them raw.

He never noticed the bruises he left from biting.

He never noticed the streams of blood when he chewed off a particularly large chunk

of skin.

It just didn't bother him, he never noticed how harmful it was.

What he did notice was how ugly they were.

What he did notice was the stubbiness of his fingers.

What he did notice was his too short nails.

What he did notice was the calluses from his drumsticks had made the skin rough.

He hated them.

He would put them in his pockets so he couldn't see them.

He would sit on them so they didn't disgust other people.

He would wear gloves outside if he couldn't be bothered stressing about them.

He didn't want to see them and he didn't want others to have to see them either.

Tyler couldn't help but notice.

He couldn't help but notice the biting, the pulling, the ripping, the blood.

He couldn't help but notice the way Josh could never look at them for too long.

He couldn't help but notice how he would always wear something with pockets.

He just did.

What bothered him is Josh didn't mind ripping skin off his cuticles.

What bothered him is Josh didn't even blink when the blood starts to drip.

What bothered him is Josh hid them away.

What bothered him is Josh never saw the harm he was doing to himself.

When Tyler had pointed it out he'd get one of four answers.

_"Oh, I didn't notice,"_

_"Really?"_

_Immediate discomfort and a quick shove in the pockets, even if they were bloody._

_A quick shrug before continuing to bite, pick, rip at them._

"Josh?"

"Yeah Ty?"

He asked around his thumb, chewing on the nail as he stared at his phone.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what Ty?"

"Hurt your hands?"

Josh tensed up before ripping his hand out of his mouth and shoving it into his hoodie.

"Josh? Please tell me, I'm worried,"

Josh didn't look at him, looked at his shoes, scuffing the floor with them.

"I hate them,"

Tyler raised an eyebrow, placing a hand on his shoulder to continue.

Josh refused to look him in the eye, eyes clouding with tears.

"Your hands?"

"Yes, they. . . They're so ugly and stubby and mangled and I get laughed at and they're

too small. You know in primary school how you'd measure your hands up against

other people's? Everyone said that mine were too small and that they were weird-I

don't know, I just, I hate them. I hate them so much-"

He cut off, pulling a hand out to gnaw at his already bruised thumb.

Tyler watches in slight horror as Josh bit down hard enough to draw blood.

He couldn't stop himself when he reached out to stop him.

He pulled his hand away from his mouth and in between his own.

"My doctor said it's called Dermatophagia,"

He mumbled pointlessly.

Maybe it was a just to have something to say.

He refused to look at Tyler, trying to pull his hands from his grip.

Tyler didn't have to touch his disgusting hands.

Josh barely wanted to look at them, let alone touch them.

Why wasn't he screaming in horror?

And when Josh opened his eyes Tyler had his hand close to his mouth.

And Josh watched in confusion as he leaned down and kissed each knuckle gently.

Josh felt butterflies erupt in his stomach as well as the feeling of wanting to throw up.

"Wh-What are you doing?"

"Every time you bite them,"

He pressed a soft kiss to his palm before mumbling with a blush,

"I'm going to kiss you,"

Josh's eyes widened as he continued pressing kisses on every bruise, every scar,

every scratch.

Josh couldn't help the watery grin that fell on his face when Tyler reached for the other

one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is for a friend


	2. Lips.

Tyler couldn't help it.

When he couldn't focus he chewed them till they bled.

When he was confused he licked them.

When he was stressed he bit his lips.

When he was bored he tugged and pulled on them with his hands.

It was just what he did.

He never noticed when he chewed them raw.

He never noticed the chapped state he left behind from licking.

He never noticed the streams of blood when he ripped the skin off.

It just didn't bother him, he never noticed how harmful it was.

What he did notice was how chapped they were.

What he did notice was the way people would stare in disgust.

What he did notice was the way they would rip open if he opened his mouth too

far.

What he did notice was the stinging he got from eating something with lemon or salt.

He hated that.

He hated the way people looked at him.

He hated the people that would tease him, "Are you hungry or something Tyler?"

He hated the Chapstick people would buy for him.

He just wanted to be left alone and chew his mouth without the smart ass comments.

Josh couldn't help but notice.

He couldn't help but notice the biting, the pulling, the ripping, the blood.

He couldn't help but notice the way Tyler could never go long without chewing them.

He couldn't help but notice how he would always flick his tongue out and wince.

He just did.

What bothered him is Tyler didn't mind ripping skin off his lips.

What bothered him is Tyler didn't even blink when the blood starts to drip.

What bothered him is Tyler covered his mouth when people stared too long..

What bothered him is Tyler never saw the harm he was doing to himself.

Josh never bothered him about it.

It wasn't his business.

But as they were sitting down, playing Mariokart on the bus, Tyler wincing what felt like

every minute, Josh finally broke.

"Stop biting your lips Ty,"

Tyler startled and dropped the controller.

"I can't,"

"Why do you do it?"

He shrugged, worrying his lips before cringing and licking them instead.

"Habit, I guess,"

He mumbles distractedly, moving a hand to cover his lips.

Josh frowned and reached out to move his hand.

Tyler looked at him with wide eyes and bloody lips.

Tyler was bumbling around his words,

"I don't know, when I was like fourteen I-I think I picked it up and uh, it was just like,

biting my lip when I was worried and then they'd get like, soggy I guess. . . And I'd uh,

peel the skin off and then sometimes they would bleed and yeah it hurts but like, I

don't really notice and the people started making fun of me for it, telling me no one

would ever want to kiss me, because of how-!"

He broke off with a squeak of surprise, Josh effectively cutting him off.

With his lips.

Josh Dun was kissing him.

With his lips.

Josh Dun had his mouth on top of Tyler's own, his own very mangled and bloody lips.

With his lips.

Josh Dun was kissing him.

With his lips.

Josh Dun was kissing him.

With his lips.

Josh Dun was no longer kissing him.

With his lips.

A bright red bloomed on both their cheeks, Josh turning the colour of his pink hair.

Tyler watched as he pulled back, his lips stained red form Tyler's blood and he licked

them slightly, screwing up his nose when he tasted Tyler's blood.

But not out of disgust.

No.

His face screwed up in a nervous pout.

"I uh, you know, the thing with my hands, you kiss them when I bite them. . . So uh. . .

I thought maybe I would do the same. But uh, that-that was probably a bad idea wasn't

it? God I'm stupid, just, just pretend I didn't do that-"

His nail was in his mouth and Tyler waited till he finished before he reached his hand

out and pressed a soft kiss to the bloody nail.

"You're not stupid,"

He had noticed another bruise and kissed that too, ignoring the stinging in his lips and

also the tingling from Josh's kiss.

"And its okay,"

He mumbled and bit his lip again out of adoration of Josh's pink cheeks.

Tyler couldn't help the smile as Josh leaned over to press his lips gently against Tyler's

own again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is based on me.


	3. Lips And Fingers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SLIGHT SELF HARM (not too bad, but if you're easily triggered please be careful and safe) AND A LITTLE BIT OF NON GRAPHIC SEXUAL IMPLICATIONS
> 
> BUT IT IS CUTE SO DEAL

When they first started dating it was simple.

It wasn't much different.

It was just added kisses and secret smiles and openly staring at the other.

It was Mark pretending to be disgusted as they kissed and blushed.

It was Michael rolling his eyes when they were late, stumbling out of the bus, leaning

into each other, with arms around each other's shoulders and waists.

It was Zach telling Josh to never hurt him.

It was both of Josh's sisters ganging up on Tyler with the exact same idea, and

actually making Tyler quite scared of the two normally lovely girls.

It was their parents smiling knowingly to each other, trading five dollar bills with grins

on their faces.

It was Jenna and Debby shouting "Finally!" before tackling them both.

It was late night conversations and heads on chests and tangled legs.

It was stolen kisses.

It was early morning skateboards down empty streets.

It was holding each other when it all got too much.

And then it got complicated.

Tyler wouldn't kiss him.

He would bite his lips and push Josh away when he tried to.

It was Josh crying to Mark, stomach sick and brain telling him it was because Tyler

hated him.

It was Mark swallowing back tears as Josh verbally ripped himself apart and not being

able to do or say anything to stop it.

Josh was convinced.

It was because Tyler was sick of him.

It was because Tyler thought he was too clingy.

It was because he finally realised how much of a freak Josh was for constantly eating

his hands.

But really it was Tyler not wanting Josh to have to kiss his mangled lips.

It was Tyler saving Josh the trouble of tasting blood.

It was Tyler saving Josh the trouble of maybe biting off some loose skin.

It was Tyler saving Josh the trouble of kissing him.

When he came on the bus one day, to collect some clothes and walk to the hotel, to

quiet sniffles coming from the bathroom, he didn't know what was happening.

"Josh?"

He got no response, only something knocking over and the sound of something heavy

hitting the floor.

"Josh? Josh, are you okay?!"

What he got was a whimpering noise and something that sounded like 'go away'.

"No Josh, I won't go away, tell me what's wrong,"

Tyler felt his eyebrows screw up and heard the laughs of Michael, Daniel, Ben and the

others coming on.

"Josh?"

Tyler's eyes widened as he heard Josh heave his stomach into the toilet.

"Josh. Open the door,"

"No,"

"Tyler what's going on?"

Ben asked worried.

Tyler didn't answer, started knocking on the door.

"Josh? Open the door,"

There was incoherent mumbling and a sniff.

"Joshua, move away from the door,"

Michael gently pushed the tearful Tyler out of the way, before pulling on the handle.

He ripped it a few times before slamming his shoulder against it.

Tyler watched in slight terror as he slammed into it again, hearing the creak of the door

breaking.

It awkwardly broke off, falling a little bit inside the room before Michael grabbed it,

stopping its tracks.

Tyler shoved past him and found a bleeding, sobbing Josh on the floor.

"Josh!?"

He said in alarm bending down and crouching in front of his lover.

He reached to grab at Josh's bleeding hands, what looked like hundreds of tiny cuts all

over them and a bloody razor laying on the counter.

Tyler pieced it all together and his mind just supplied him with, NoNoNo.

"Josh-Oh my God,"

Josh pulled his hand away, moving a knuckle to his mouth and wincing as he bit

several of the tiny cuts.

"Why Josh?"

"Because, I'm disgusting. I'm so disgusting, I wish I was normal. I wish I wasn't a freak.

I wish I didn't bite my stupid hands. And why would you care? Who would care? I'm just

a freak that eats his hands and whose boyfriend won't kiss him because of how

disgusting he is. And I'm pathetic. I'm crying and bleeding and nobody will love me, not

even you. Nobody will ever love me, because how could someone bother? And I hate

this-my hands-me, I hate me so much and, now you're gonna leave me, because I'm

clingy and gross and I'm a freak-"

Tyler watched him break off and suck in a crying sob. Tyler felt tears well in his eyes as

his boyfriend, his beautiful, kind, loving, thoughtful, perfect boyfriend, hurt himself for

something he simply can't help.

"No-You're not a freak Baby-I'm sorry, so sorry. You're not disgusting, no, I'm sorry I

pushed you away-"

He broke off grabbing one of Josh's hand, watching the crimson fall and splatter

beneath them as Josh tried to rip it back.

Tyler pressed his lips to it, staining his lips in red and kissed each little cut he could

see, before talking again, voice thick with tears.

"-I didn't want you to have to kiss me because of how gross my lips are. I did-didn't

want you to have to deal with blood in your mouth every time we kissed-"

"-I don't care about that Tyler! I'll kiss you until your lips fall off! I'll drown in your blood

if it means I get to kiss you and nobody else does! I care about you, not about your

lips. . . _Iloveyou_ ,"

Tyler felt his eyes widen and bit his lip to stop from sobbing.

Josh tentatively leaned up and looked into his eyes, silently asking permission. Tyler

surged forward, capturing Josh's mouth in a soft, slow, sweet kiss, blood from lips and

fingers mingling, salt from tears dripping from noses, tasting disgusting but it was

perfect and broken and Tyler loved him.

"I'm so sorry Josh, I'm so, so sorry-"

"-Shh,"

Tyler opened his eyes and there was a twinkle in them that he had never seen.

He reached for his bag of clothes, not once taking his eyes off of Josh.

Josh did the same, gripping Tyler's hand and walking slowly off the bus.

They didn't take their eyes off each other when the hostess greeted them.

They didn't blink when the elevator operator asked what floor.

They didn't bat an eye when the door slipped open.

And when Josh pressed Tyler against the door and kissed him, Tyler felt all his love for

him surge through his entire being.

Because that's what the warm fuzzy feeling below his navel was whenever Josh looked

at him.

Because that's what the spinning his head did when Josh smiled, almost painfully

adorable.

Because that's what the rapid beat of his heart meant when Josh walked into a room.

And when they fell on the bed Tyler remembered his gross lips and broke the kiss off,

pulling Josh's hips on his own instead.

Josh let out the most beautiful sound and Tyler fell even more in love.

Josh's lips were on his neck and Tyler never got why that was so wonderful and began

to push his shoulders- _oh my god._

Josh sucked bruises across Tyler's neck, over his collar bone, the base of his throat.

And when Josh sucked his ear lobe into his mouth, another thing Tyler didn't know

why was so ' _great_ ', couldn't help but agree with all those people that said that.

He couldn't help but rut against Josh.

Josh was praising him, and went to kiss his lips again but Tyler turned his head so that

his jaw was there to kiss instead.

Josh pulled back and gave him a look.

"Ty, I don't care, please kiss me,"

"Okay, then touch me,"

Josh recoiled slightly, hands clenching the sheets beside Tyler's head.

He watched Josh shift uncomfortably, before moving to crawl off.

"Josh-"

"-Its okay, it's, it's fine. . . It's fine-"

Tyler reached over and grabbed one of his hands and let it hover above his jaw.

Josh moved to pull it away and Tyler grabbed the other one, pressing it to his mouth

tentatively.

"Touch me Josh,"

Josh bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut, hands shaking.

"Please Josh, _please_ ,"

And suddenly Josh's hand was gripping his hair and tugging and a hand was under his

shirt and Tyler was kissing him and moaning into his mouth and it felt so good,

everywhere Josh touched tingled and burned.

He flipped them at one point to pull off Tyler's shirt and he saw little trails of blood all

over his chest and stomach and he couldn't care, just took a hand and pressed a kiss

to it.

Josh looked down at Tyler, whose lips were absolutely wrecked and swollen and he

couldn't help but think he was the most beautiful thing in the world.

The way his mouth would part in pleasure, the little gasps of hot breath against his

skin.

The way his moans fell from his lips drove Josh absolutely crazy.

The way his lips, the way they would mouth at his collar bone, the way they would part

to show his slightly crooked teeth as he bit down on Josh's hip, shoulder, neck,

whatever they could find.

Josh was in love with the way he bit them when Josh sucked at his collarbone.

Josh was in love with the way they formed an 'O' shape as he came by Josh's hands.

Josh was in love with the way they would form his name in a desperate whine.

Josh was in love with the way he would lick his lips before moving to kiss him again.

Josh was in love with Tyler.

And Josh was even more in love with him when as Tyler came he finally whispered

 _Iloveyou_ back.

Tyler looked up at Josh, beautiful, addictive, talented, exuberant Josh.

Josh, who's hands tugged on his hair, exposing his neck and licking, biting, pulling on

the skin there.

Josh, who's rough hands made him feel every touch like he never had before.

Josh, who's hands made his body hyper sensitive, so painfully aware of every brush of

fingers, every grip, every press in all the right places.

Josh, who's hands made him quiver in anticipation.

Josh, who's hands skimmed his body like he was something fragile and breakable and

it drove him absolutely insane.

Josh, who's hands gripped his hips and pulled them up in perfect time and Tyler

couldn't help but remember a phrase he heard once, " _There's nothing better then_

 _getting banged by a drummer_ ,".

Tyler couldn't help the quiet laugh as he repeated it to Josh who fumbled and almost

fell on top of him, elbows buckling in surprise and flushed a bright red, hiding his face

in Tyler's neck.

Josh, who's hands with dull, jagged nails dragged down his back.

Josh, who's hands tangled in his hair and drawing out sounds he didn't even know he

could make.

Josh, who's hands clenched the bed sheet as he moaned Tyler's name like it was

some sort of prayer, some sort of _Saint_.

Josh, who's hands ran up Tyler's chest to hold his jaw and press his lips to Tyler's,

tugging on his lip.

Josh, who's hand gripped his own as though if he let go Tyler would slip away, as he

came, eyes closed and panting heavily and Tyler thought he was the most beautiful

thing on this earth, his hands especially.

Josh, who's hands were rough and scarred and mangled and bloody were doing things

to Tyler that he never knew were _possible_.

Made him feel worth it.

Made him not feel like a freak.

Made his lips tingle instead of sting.

Made his mouth taste like toothpaste and Josh instead of blood.

Made him feel _loved_.

He had zero troubles mumbling those three little words in Josh's ear as they came

together in pure bliss.

 

Slowly, the very thing they hated about themselves became the very thing the other

person loved the most.


End file.
